OCD

Laid back, roll with the punches, take things as they come, face one day at a time...all good qualities that honestly do not describe me AT ALL. OCD is the term often used to describe me. I have come to accept that I am a perfectionist neat freak who over stresses about everything and with that comes the need to constantly feel in control. Not in charge per say, I am not saying that i have to be in charge of everything, but as far as my life goes, I feel the need to be in complete control. This has always been one of my main struggles in my walk with God because it is so hard for me to turn over control of every aspect of my life. I have always wanted to have an exact itinerary of my life. When I am unsure of something, I stress, worry, and become super anxious. Lately God has really been teaching me to trust Him with what comes next. My life has been so upside down lately and that has stresses me greatly. However, God has given me comfort through His word that it is okay if I don't know what tomorrow will bring. It is okay if I am unsure about what to do in every situation because God knows what will happen. God has already "read my story". I have begun to compare my life to a novel in the sense that God knows how it ends and He knows what the next "chapter" will bring and while I am anxious to "stay up all night" and find out what happens next, I don't have to be anxious. I have always wanted to be in control, but because I'm not I can relax. God is in control.